Wednesday, April 25, 2012

nothing wonderful in particular.






exactly....
i could not have said it better myself {thanks, andy}

For most of life, nothing wonderful happens.

If you don’t enjoy getting up and working and finishing your work and sitting down to a meal with family or friends, then the chances are that you’re not going to be very happy.

If someone bases his happiness or unhappiness on major events like a great new job, huge amounts of money, a flawlessly happy marriage or a trip to Paris, that person isn’t going to be happy much of the time.

If, on the other hand, happiness depends on a good breakfast, flowers in the yard, a drink or a nap, then we are more likely to live with quite a bit of happiness.
— 
Andy Rooney




Monday, April 16, 2012

heart to heart kind of love.

today i watched my friend say farewell to her mama.
with love.

i watched her brave little self walk right up to the front of the church...
{after she sweetly removed her heels to maintain position}
and express out loud the love that existed for her mother.
she focused on the places
love IS. and where love WAS. 
she encouraged us all to love.
heart to heart.
just love.

today.
the love.
it is all that mattered.

she said it. 
she meant it.
she felt it.
it was so obvious.
so beautiful.
my heart over-flowed. 
with LOVE.

as she spoke. and others spoke. 
it clearly was out of love.
not one person in that church would disagree.

 her mama is heaven bound -  and through all the challenges and stumbles that existed....
love existed and will forever exist.
regardless.


today was influential to my soul...and made me think deep. 
{surprise, surprise, right? }

love. 
have i ever mentioned how much i LOVE love? 
i do.
today served as a HUGE reminder of that.

i reference....
that deep down, non-"convenient", KIND OF LOVE.
the love you feel so intense and pure that it penetrates into the abyss of the SOUL.
it persists.
through every single obstruction and challenge.
it is SO inconvenient, yet convenient.
it can be so fulfilling, yet so hurtful.
it can be so challenging, yet so easy.
LOVE is SO WORTH IT.
'cause TYPICALLY it runs so VERY deep.

deep.
deep.
deep.
down.
sometimes SO DEEP it hides, and then emerges at JUST the right time.
'cause it was always there to begin with.
kinda just meant to be.

THAT kind of LOVE makes you feel as though you know like you know.....
you have been connected FOREVER and EVER.
and always will be.

doesn't matter WHO you feel this love for...
your parents.
your babies.
your friends.
the people you choose to have life altering experiences with.
your family.

love is love.
that is what i think.
simple as that.

each SOUL that makes a mark on your life.
LOVE them.
LOVE them outloud. LOVE them silently.
LOVE them with gratitude.
just send it out there with every FIBER of your being.
no fear.

no matter how that LOVE ends up.
it is worth it.

because any source of LOVE at all is something to treasure.
it all stems in a place of pureness.
it has purpose.
heaven sent.

remember.

 the WAY you love someone can change.
as you drift away from one another or closer to one another.
it can change daily...sometimes HOURLY.
HA!
but if is was ever LOVE to begin with.
it will last for always - on some level.
love can fade.
 or even become a little lost.
it can SEEM as though you may NEVER find your way back to certain people you love....
but....
regardless of distance.
regardless of status.
regardless of circumstance.
regardless of ANYTHING.
on some level.
however faint.
true deep down simple love remains.


heart to heart.
{as sara reminded us} 
non-"convenient".
no expectation.
The kind of love that just resigns to 
accept you as you are...regardless.
the best kind ever.
Completely God - GIVEN. 


that kind of love. 
it sticks.
i love THAT - so very much.

xoxo,
ang.




Thursday, April 12, 2012

another "moment" - and then another. and maybe one more.

sometimes i get stuck on things.
my favorites...such as....

my boys.
butterflies. 
angels.
magic.
love.
peace.
energy.
spirituality.
following my heart.
sappy stuff, right?

however - the most intriguing thing in my life...are my "moments".
CREATE THIS MOMENT.
{my self proclaimed blog title}
where did that come from?
i have no idea.
i don't know.

but it was MEANT to mean something to me, cause i just CAN'T move beyond the wonder of each moment. 
 each one. 
and the IMPACT they make. 
 the way they come full circle.
 the essence they hold to carry us through and TO the next NECESSARY MOMENT.


 THIS i know for SURE.
MOMENTS are ALL we really have.
and i have FINALLY started to treasure them.
good. bad. pain. joy.

all of it. 
embraced.
endured.
i have started pressing the "PAUSE" button.
live that. 
love that.
hear that.
know that.
FEEL that.


it IS POSSIBLE you know.
to pause. 
to let it ALL SINK IN.

i remember the MOMENT my oldest son was born.
the VERY MOMENT i first laid eyes on him.
single little mama.
just 19.
lost.
yet secure.
hurt & alone.
yet SO VERY STRONG.
all over the place.
yet FOCUSED.
i can CLOSE MY EYES and take myself RIGHT THERE.

that moment.
and it is ALL MINE.
recorded in my heart.
forever.
every detail.

in ONE MOMENT life came FULL CIRCLE.
LOVE took on a NEW MEANING.

i became part of him.
he part of me.
MY moment.
OUR moment.

moments significant.
or not so significant.
change us.
without warning.
THAT is a beautiful thing.
THAT is a tragic thing.
THAT is life.
moment by moment.


confusing, life altering, frustrating, endured.

moments. 
they can ruin you. 
they can MAKE you.
they can take your heart and set it in a holding place.
or
they can set your heart FREE to bigger and better things.
it is all up to you. always.

tonight.
i had several "moments"
all BEAUTIFUL.
and i STOPPED.
smiled.
and let myself "have" them.
for the FIRST time ever.

'cause here is a TRUE STORY.

no matter WHERE i have been in my life.
i have never felt "arrived" - NOT EVER.
i am constantly trying to live down all the mistakes i have made.
making up for my inconsistency.
my lack of detail.
my simple nature.

for lack of better words - in essence - i have never stopped the urgency to "prove myself".

i don't know WHERE that comes from - it is just me, i guess.
me against me.
so dumb.

i am kinda tired of being against me.

so TONIGHT...my moments...
they elevated me.
i ALLOWED myself to feel happy.
to feel the joy of others and let that take me to a place of contentment.

you should do that, too.
take a moment to "arrive" in simple non-arrogance.
just arrival.
'cause you have and all it takes is a moment of appreciation.
for where you have been, where you ARE and where you are GOING.
it's alright.
you CAN FEEL GOOD.
it is allowed.
and better yet - it is EXPECTED.
and it is ALL YOURS.
be proud. 

we all have moments we want to remember.
we chose to forget.
we can't let go of.
and we hope will NEVER HAPPEN.

it is the art of being human.

my hope for YOU.
is that in THIS MOMENT...you are at peace. 
you have love in your life.
...and you LOOK FORWARD to embracing each and every experience that will follow.

another "MOMENT" blog - sorry.
i just love this moment.
i hope you do too.

xoxo,
enjoy.